based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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