Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
