I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
