just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You're a waste of cheezeits
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
