If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Randomize
