i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
