I think i peed on brittanys purse
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
