All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
