If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
