she is the kim kardashian of front butts
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize