Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
This is the high leading the old right now
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
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