youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
