i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
More tranny stories later!
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Randomize