Your tits are I can't wait for
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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