If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
