Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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