how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
We named our party play list daddy issues
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
