Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
