break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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