I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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