it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
