Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
