You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
