Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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