i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
