I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize
