It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
The uberlube is also flammable
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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