Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
