You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
