singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
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