I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize