she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
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