My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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