I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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