420 ftw
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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