I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
cat food counts as protein by the way
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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