It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
