some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
