And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
