Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
