it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize