Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize
