talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
