she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize