Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
