just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
She just used a chaser for red wine.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
