I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
