before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
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