You're a womanizer and a bitch.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
