just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
